Having a healthy marriage is very important. For married church ministers, it does not only become a blessing to them when their spouse and children are happy and are enjoying a good family relationship, but it also is a prerequisite for them to be healthy and effective ministers in whatever area the Lord puts them in.
God has a very weighty emphasis on ministers treating their spouses well. In fact, He gets angry when a minister prioritises church ministry more than relationship with family. You may not want to believe that, but God is serious about it.
Ministry vs. marriage
We must realise that God sees everything. We can never mask our marriage woes with ministry antics. Consider Malachi 2:13-14, when God ignored a priest's offerings because of his unfaithfulness to his wife.
"Here is another thing you do. You cover the Lord's altar with tears, weeping and groaning because He pays no attention to your offerings and doesn't accept them with pleasure. You cry out, 'Why doesn't the Lord accept my worship?' I'll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows."
If a minister becomes unfaithful to his spouse, God will surely be angry no matter how faithful he is to the church. Moreover, the minister will also fail in his first ministry, which is family.
Discipling others vs. discipling your family
"Didn't the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are His. And what does He want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth." (Malachi 2:15)
Another thing that gets on God's nerves is when His ministers fail to produce Godliness in their homes. When ministers take good care of their spouses, they are enabled to produce godly children, which is one of the things that God wants ministers to have.
Faithfulness to your church vs. faithfulness to your spouse
Before you could become a faithful shepherd who can oversee a flock for the Lord, you should first learn to watch your heart so that you can be faithful to your spouse and treat her well.
"For I hate divorce!" says the Lord, the God of Israel. "To divorce your wife is to overwhelm her with cruelty," says the Lord of Heaven's Armies. "So guard your heart; do not be unfaithful to your wife." (Malachi 2:16)
Also consider what Paul told Timothy: "For if a man cannot manage his own household, how can he take care of God's church?" (1 Timothy 3:5)
Marriage first
Friend, God wants all ministers to put everything in the right perspective. Your relationship with your spouse is more weighty than your relationship with your co-workers and flock in church. Remember, even Christ Himself was and is very faithful to His Bride, and we should be, too.
