"We've said that this is a church where it's OK to not be OK, and I'm not OK. I'm tired. And I'm broken and I just need some rest."
Those were the words of Nashville megachurch pastor Pete Wilson who resigned after fourteen years of leading Cross Point Church which he founded back in 2003. As sad as it is to see another leader get burnt-out by the unchecked pressures of ministry, one cannot deny that Pastor Pete did the right thing at the most relevant moment- He admitted to weakness.
So much of church culture falls under this wrong assumption that being tired, broken, hurt, emotional or angry is something God is not interested in knowing and that no one should find out. But as the classic saying goes, "You can't hide from the truth." It's funny to think that we can hide our feelings from God as if He didn't already know them.
One of the things I love about the Bible is how authentic and honest it can get even with the lowest and weakest points of the most Godly men. In Psalms 22, the psalmist David writes, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" Has God forsaken him? We know that God promises that He will never leave us nor forsake us (Deuteronomy 31:6), but what we learn from this scripture is God would rather have us be sincere and wrong than have us sincerely wrong and thinking we're OK.
Authenticity matters more than quick fixes
The whole gist of the gospel starts with first accepting our sinfulness and inability to save ourselves. Why should it be any different when we start following Christ? We will forever need Jesus. The apostle Paul once referred so openly to "a thorn of the flesh" that had tormented him and slowed him down. There was no shame in it and didn't have to act as if he was the pastor that had no problems.
God is not on the search for perfect people who will not need His help and who will be independent. He is instead looking for worshippers who will authentically worship and seek Him in spirit and in truth.
When we're OK with not being OK, God restores best
The paradox that is 2 Corinthians 12:10 is what brings the most powerful restoration ever - "For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." We will always face a challenge, mountain, problem or situation that is beyond us and in that moment, God wants us to admit that we are not OK.
When we admit that we are in our greatest moment of weakness and that we are incapable of saving ourselves and need the intervention of the Almighty God, that's the moment when God comes through. Having said that, God coming through should not be misinterpreted as a magic button that can instantaneously restore us to maximum strength and keep us where we are. A time out really is sometimes called for and the journey back to full strength can be exactly that, a journey that takes time and needs the input of other people with energy and wisdom to spare. What God cares about most is not results or 'success' in the human sense, but that we are fully restored, no matter how long it takes.
