So much of parenting today focuses on getting kids into our world—our rules, our ideas, our dreams and our expectations. But if you were to make an honest assessment of yourself as a parent, how often do you make the deliberate effort of leaving your own world and engaging your children in theirs?
I always looked at 1 Corinthians 9:20-21 as purely a ministry scripture. The idea of becoming a Jew to a Jew and a Greek to a Greek is a great evangelism strategy and worked very well with Paul in his early ministry. It's also been tested and proven to be effective in modern discipleship. We see so many churches "becoming Jews and Greeks" in one way or another, and it does draw people to God.
But can we take this concept and apply it to parenting?
Not only is it effective, but I would even say it's necessary. So many kids refuse to open up to their parents because they feel there's a wall between the two of them. As parents, we can break down that wall by engaging our kids in their world.
Here are three simple ways we can do that more.
1. Get Into What They're Into
What's your son's favourite sport or your daughter's favourite movie? We can be the kinds of parents that cross check if their interests pan out with our values or we can slow down, step back and engage them first in their world. Why do they like what they like? You'll be surprised by the many wonderful things that your children value.
And getting into their interests will call for an investment of your time, effort and even finances. But when you build that world together with your child, you'll find there will be lesser to no walls between you and them.
2. Take Time to Be Physically and Mentally Present
So much of family time has been eaten up by work and simple amusement. Television, overtime work hours and social media have distracted us from what really matters—time with the family.
As parents, the responsibility is up to us to build deliberate ways to be physically and mentally present in regular and fixed increments throughout a day or a week.
3. Genuinely Care About What They Care
Do you remember what it was like to be a kid? Chances are you don't. Even if you did, the values back then would probably be a whole lot different than today.
That calls for an effort to put our heart back into our children to see what makes their heart beat. What are they passionate about? What trials are they going through? What are they worried about?
In the same way that Jesus made the effort to become man just like us so He could identify with our pain and suffering, we ought to make that same effort to identify with the cares and passions of our children as well.
